What’s a Layne Radlauer?

I’m lucky to have a name that’s wholly unique — there is no other Layne Radlauer in the world. That’s not to say my name is inherently better than other people’s, but it is nice to have my own domain name and email address. The name itself is androgynous, which may come in handy if I ever get around to becoming a world-famous romance novelist. You might wonder where such an unusual name comes from. This article will dispel the mystery.

The First Name

My first name means “a long, narrow road.” It’s not a predecessor to the more common “Lane,” but a variant of the word before the English language was standardized. I doubt that my mother thought much about long, narrow roads or archaic spellings of pathways when she named me.

Here’s the story. My dad and Layne Stanely from Alice and Chains were hanging out one day. The former sent my mom a letter, writing “Layne and I went to so-and-so” in cursive. She liked the way it was written and thus, she chose the name. If you’re curious, my dad and Layne Stanely were good friends. The band even played at my parent’s legendary wedding.

The Last Name

Radlauer is pronounced rad-lau-er. While unusual, it’s easier to pronounce than it looks. The town of Radlów, nestled in Southern Poland, is probably the home of my familial (not blood-related) ancestors. Like many last names, it was likely anglicanized and given to immigrants.

This is complete conjecture. I read an explanation of the now-defunct Radlauer.com. Ancestry and other genealogy websites have more info, but I’m not spending money to fill out this blog post. I’m the only one who’ll read these (if you do, send me an email).

The Middle Name

My middle name is truly wondrous. If you heard it, your mind might break under the sheer stress of its beautiful magnitude. That’s why I only tell friends, employers and clients. If you’re interested in learning my middle name, contact and hire me as your SEO content freelancer, copywriter or literally anything else.